A Few Changes

Where to start? Well, I passed all my classes but lost my scholarship. That means that I can't afford school right now so I am moving home to work full time. Either I will go to  a Universtiy near my house or I will go to China. It's all a toss up right now. I am a little sad at how things have turned out, but mostly, I feel so relieved to have a semester off. It seems to me that Heavenly Father has been preparing me for this for a while now. Even though this isn't really what I had in mind for myself, it's what He had in mind that counts. I've been placing a lot of trust in Him lately and sometimes, I get nervous because I might not like what He plans for me. In the long run, I know that He knows best and I will see those blessings eventually. To explain a little, I was working at McDonald's at school. They weren't going to give me the break off to go home so I was going to be spending most of my break away from home. It wasn't worth it to me so I thought a lot about quitting. I mulled over it a lot and finally decided to quit. I prayed about it and it felt like the right thing to do. I was a little confused because I needed to pay rent for my apartment for the first of January and I wouldn't be able to make the money if I quit. That's when I knew I was going to be relying very heavily on Heavenly Father and my faith. I quit my job and came home. I took over a cleaning job for my brother in hopes of making enough to pay for it. Today is January 3rd and my last check from McDonald's still hasn't arrived and I still haven't been paid for the cleaning job. I'm scared that the money won't come till after a $50 late fee gets tacked onto my already expensive rent. I just keep reminding myself to have faith and remember that I've done all I can, I just need to leave it up to him. I probably won't be able to sell my contract, but if anyone is interested, let me know! ;)

Life is so unpredictable. That must be why I love it so much. You get into the swing of things and it sends a curve ball. Some curve balls really stink but others are awesome. Either way, they bring blessings and growth. I've grown a lot in just four months, enough to say I'm done moving out, but I needed to do it for a while so I could grow more. I always said I would move out and I was so anxious to be on my own. After doing that for a while, I missed my family way too much and I didn't like only worrying about myself. Call me crazy! :) It took me almost the whole semester to adjust to life and I was completely not myself. I would come home for a weekend or break and all those feelings would just melt away. I never wanted to go back to my apartment very much, but I never dreaded it either. I had fun down at school, so so much fun! I just like living where people know me and love me no matter what. I'm always accepted at home and I always have friends. Maybe I'm taking the easy way out, but it feels right. I'm much better at making new friends when I'm home than when I'm away. I've already made some new friends this winter break than I did in a whole semester away. I'm so grateful to my room mates who dealt with me and my dysfunctional self and to Heavenly Father who gave me such a wonderful experience. I'm ready to grow in some other ways now, progress in life more. Life is nothing with out progression. I just barely found a video I would like to share with you that I really liked. :)
"Look Not Behind Thee"

So moving home is one change. The other is that I've finally decided on a blog name I like and the url is different now. The title comes from a talk by President Thomas S. Monson in General Conference 2008. My new URL is www.thewaytojoy.blogspot.com. That about sums up all the changes. For now...